Often you need to adjust php-fpm for the memory available, and to do so you need to average the child processes memory usage.

Human readable:

 ps -eo size,pid,user,command --sort -size | awk '{ hr=$1/1024 ; printf("%13.2f Mb ",hr) } { for ( x=4 ; x<=NF ; x++ ) { printf("%s ",$x) } print "" }' | grep php-fpm 

and also machine friendly:

 ps -ylC php-fpm --sort:rss